So here’s my theory in a nutshell: when we act like victims, we look like monsters. When trying to fend off pain for ourselves or our loved ones, we often hurt other people. As long as we don’t see the people around us as fully human -- people whose feelings and needs are as important as our own -- we can’t see how much hurt we're inflicting or how scary we can be. These hurt people around us then feel like victims and there's a very strong temptation not to see us as fully human. This can start a cycle of violence. We end up with a bunch of people who see themselves as victims fighting the good fight against monsters. But when we're on the battlefield, we all think we're the victims and we all see monsters, clear as day, in front of us. No one thinks they're a monster.
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